Everyone flops at something. Try and try again.  Failure crushes you temporarily. Sometimes a bit. Sometimes a lot. Everything will be alright. I have learned to not push it away by distracting myself. Don’t pretend to be happy by putting on a smile when deep down, you want to cry. Shed those tears and move on. Allow yourself to hurt for a while and stop rejecting it. The faster you let it go, in the long run, it will be less painful. Allow yourself to feel all of your emotions.


When you have a setback, it’s very easy to waggle in rejection, believing that you will always keep being defeated. Simply not true. Everything has a term, a start, and a finish date. Don’t start thinking that you are a failure. Instead,. remind yourself that: You can do anything you set your mind to do especially when you trust in a higher power. Have faith that your circumstances will eventually turn around and you will have everything your heart desires. We manifest what we believe, so do yourself a favor and dream big. If God placed a desire in your heart it will come to pass. Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4; For where your treasure is, there will be your heart Matthew 6:21.

•    Failure today is not a failure tomorrow. This is temporary.

•    This set back will not last for the rest of your life. Keep moving forward and take action, try to learn from your failures.  Failure is the best teacher

•    Be constructive, not destructive. Ask yourself better questions so that you do not send yourself down a negative spiral. What could I have done differently? How can I better prepare myself for the next opportunity?

1.    What can I learn from this setback? A setback is a set up for your victory

2.    How can I adjust my course to avoid making another mistake like this? Should I try a different approach?

3.    What can I do differently moving forward? Adjust your mindset

Spend some time with these questions and be truthful with yourself as you seek to find your answers. Take it easy, there is no rush. Some answers happen right away, but others may take a day or two or even weeks to arrive. Anyone who wants to move forward in life often fails before they succeed. Try and try again until you get the result you are seeking.

One of the most powerful things you can do is to release your emotional fallout. Keeping them bottled up will do more harm. Take these action steps:

o    Vent to a friend. Someone who listens and will allow you to sort out your thoughts for yourself.

o    Having a conversation about the problem will enable you to see things from another perspective. A new set of lenses.

o    Find inspiration and support from your circle. Learn from someone who has gone through similar setbacks. Especially someone who has had a delay and now is very successful. Experience is the best teacher.

o    Don’t get stuck in mulling in this situation for too long. Move something.

Failure is the reality of life. Let’s face it. Everyone makes mistakes. But still, we hate to fail …but don’t give failure power over your life. I know its difficult to let it go. Don’t take it personally. Separate your failures from who you are as an individual. Use these four strategies:

•    Take inventory of your failures and learn from them. Adjust. Suspend your feelings of anger, self-doubt, and blame. Thomas Edison failed 10,000 times while he was inventing the light bulb. I read once that he said I found 10,000 ways to do something that does not work. Use this insight to propel you to move forward.

•    Don’t live in your failure. Find a new space to reside.

•    Approval from others is meaningless. Their judgment of you does not define your success. This life is yours, not theirs. Your truth is your truth.

•    Shift your perspective. Our unhealthy attitude toward failure has made us believe that failure is the end of all. Not TRUE. Seek out a new point of view.

Whether you are denied a new job, had a bad breakup, promotion, or failed to qualify for a contest, failing feels terrible. Understanding how to cope with failure healthily is ultimately the way to go. In a matter of days, we will start a New Year. I can’t wait for 2020. New beginnings. What are some ways you deal with failure?

H. Mackey. June 2017. The 7 Reasons Why We Fail. Success Magazine. https://www.success.com/the-7-reasons-we-fail/

M. Heath. Ten Common Reasons Why Most People Fail. https://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/10-common-reasons-most-people-fail.html

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